Self-Talk

Self-talk is really just your stream of consciousness. Anything and everything that is going on in your head is a form of self-talk. Whether it be actually talking to yourself, narrating your life or just turning your attention from one place to another. We have thousands of thoughts per day and it would be impossible to notice them all. However, it’s really important to notice our thought patterns, especially in different situations.

Thought patterns are just ways of thinking or forms of self-talk that are typical for you depending on the situation you are in. An example would be if you see there is a workout this week with lots of front squats and you absolutely love front squats. Your pattern of thinking might include thoughts about how excited you are to do the workout, how badly you are going to crush it or game planning the best strategy for you. It’s not the same thought ever single time, but it has to do with the same way of thinking. On the flip side, maybe you have a workout with a lot of burpees. You loathe burpees and will think of every excuse not to go to class, not to give your best effort or some way to scale/modify so it doesn’t “hurt” as badly. Those are patterns.

After self-awareness, in my opinion, self-talk is one of the most foundational mental skills you can have. Obviously, we all do some form of self-talk but it’s about noticing the way you talk to and with yourself and whether or not it is productive towards your goals and the life you want to live. I would argue it also precedes all the other mental skills (aside from self-awareness, as you need to be aware of your thoughts before you can do anything about them.

Interestingly, most people’s self-talk develops by the age of 7 (and yes, we tend to talk to ourselves the way our parents or guardians talk to us or how we hear them talk to themselves. If you plan on having kids or do have kids, paying attention is even more important). However, just because we have patterns engrained in us for such a long time does not mean we can’t change them or notice them and change them faster.

There are multiple ways to address self-talk, so this is not the skill itself, but rather the umbrella competency. The goal with self-talk is to notice it, accept it and reframe it as needed based on what your goals and who you want to be.

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